Q: How do you get a 5-year-old boy interested in chess?

A:

Yes, it’s a Justice League chess set, and my son Sam has instantly learned chess.

I’m not the kind of dad who insists that his 5-year-old play chess, but Sam has been playing this Justice League video game, “Halls of Injustice,” in which his heroes move on a grid and make specific actions to defeat their opponents, and it’s about five time more complicated than chess, so I thought I’d give it a shot. No problem at all. He grasps the principles without a second thought. I doubt I have another Mac Pomeranc on my hands — although I would not complain if I did — but it’s a huge leap forward for the boy and, as usual, I have the Justice League to thank for it.

The players, for those curious, are:

White (let’s call them white, even though they’re silver) Superman is King, Wonder Woman is Queen, Flash is Bishop, Batman is (Dark) Knight, and Hawkgirl is Rook.  Green Lantern is the Pawn. 

Black (gold) are: Shade is King (What?  No Lex Luthor?  I guess he’s too much of a Superman villain), Star Sapphire is Queen (well, better than Cheetah, I guess) , Solomon Grundy is Bishop (Solomon Grundy?  They let him run the diagonal length of the board?  Solomon Grundy?) Ultra-Humanite is Knight, Copperhead is Rook (Copperhead, right — guy in a snake suit is going to go up against a flying alien with an indestructible weapon), and an alien robot called a Manhunter (Sam had to remind me which episode they appear in) is the Pawn.

All of this makes sense to me except Hawkgirl, who doesn’t seem to be very rook-like in her attitude.  But it was either her or Martian Manhunter, and someone had to get the axe — might as well be the creepy green guy from another planet no one likes.

Martian Manhunter’s mother: “You can change your shape, J’onn, why don’t you change it to look more like that nice Superman boy?  I’d bet you’d get your own chess piece then.”

J’onn J’onnz: “Moo-oommm…”

Captured on the sidelines, the Amazon queen steals some time with her Dark Knight.  Batman, of course, plays it cool.

John Stewart: “Wait a minute, why is the black guy a pawn?  What are you trying to teach kids?”

Superman, for some reason, looks a little put out at having been made King.  Little pouty.  Like maybe he said “Ooh!  I’ll be King!”  And then he found out that he can only move one space and everyone wants to kill him.

It’s a little weird to hear things like “Are you sure you want to move your Wonder Woman there?  Because my Copperhead could capture her and that would put your Superman in Check.  Why don’t you move your Batman there, ’cause that would block my Ultra-Humanite from capturing your Flash,” but one gets used to it quickly.